You are what you tell yourself

September 11, 2013

I hate it when people put themselves down, because it becomes self-fulfilling. “I can’t do this, I can’t do that”… Of course you can’t, you’ve already convinced yourself it’s impossible! How can you even begin if you’ve cut yourself off at the legs?

This may seem obvious, but take it a step further – it extends to attributes that aren’t necessarily bad. Labels matter, especially the ones we give ourselves. They determine who we are.

For instance, I used to call myself an introvert. Now being an introvert isn’t bad, but I wanted to be more outgoing, to be able to talk freely in crowds and walk up to people and introduce myself. The first step? Stop pigeonholing myself as an introvert, and start saying that I’m both. I can be introverted, and I can also be extroverted. This is true as well.

The result was that I’m more extroverted than I used to be. Go listen to one of the RandomC podcasts – anyone listening to those without reading this post wouldn’t believe for a second that I’m anything but super outgoing. There’s your proof.

If you don’t like something about yourself, stop giving yourself an excuse to not even try to change. “That’s just the way I am,” you say. Bullshit. There are some limits, yes – I will never be as extroverted as my super outgoing older brother – but you can change a lot more than you think.

Stop telling yourself you’re one way when you can just as easily be another. Choose who you want to be, and then be that person. It all starts in your mind.